The glue of society, once tactile is now brittle and dry. It erodes, quickening as time moves on. The fibres straining against the tension. The tension pulling tighter and tighter. Once stable roots, now getting pulled from the earth. The tension heating the atmosphere and burning the uprooted trees.
We are all burning.
Staring at a blank page. Willing the words to come. Sweat starting to bead. A feeling of hopelessness, a deep seated belief that you’re wrong starts to resurface. Sadly, its only the tip of the iceberg.
Starting to worry, but there is no deadline. Is that better or worse? Do I need a deadline, would the words magically start to flow due to some constraint? Am I overthinking this?
How do I start? Do I start at the end and work back? Do I start at the beginning? Do I start in the middle and try and fill in either end? Do I need a template? Where is my style guide?
Ah, the doorbell.
It all started with an email. A simple email, it only contained the words “NOUNS ARE FALSE”.
At first, it seemed like a joke, but the more people talked, the more they started to believe. It grew, slowly at first. Then it became viral, there were videos made, academics discussed the idea, cultures started to change, warp, meanings lost. New meanings were found.
As the idea spread, the world started to darken. Not just metaphorically but the stars started to disappear and the universe began to shrink. Then slowly whole regions disappeared, followed by countries. As they reached a tipping point of believers, they could no longer define themselves and disappeared into nothingness.
At first, it was just pronouns that disappeared, and slowly the nouns that had been verbed crumbled into the dust. Eventually there was noth……
The feeling it just washes over me. Washing all the colour out. All the hope it evaporates. I just sit and stare. Stare at what, nothing, just the inner monologue inside my head. A cliche battleground.
One, that I hope to defeat.
Become victorious in my own battle against myself.
The chances seem slim though.
I often lie and ponder life. Wonder why I took the doorways and paths that I did. Was it all set out before me, was I pre-determined to take this route, or did I have free will and take a path that I choose freely.
If I was pre-determined do I then have to take responsibility for any of my actions? Is believing that I am guided a cop-out for having agency in my life? Is it a way to resolve the inner personal demons?
I lie awake at night wondering about this. Would it also mean that all the good I have done, matter not, as I couldn’t pick morally whether I should or not? I was just guided to act.
Does following a certain path mean that I have to believe in god and fate? Does free will mean we should all be atheists?
What path should I follow?