Typing words on WordPress, what is my goal. Is it to clean my mind? If it is why at times does it take great effort to avoid a blank screen? Is it because I want fame? Why then to hide my name and most photographs of myself? Is it for follows? How do I play that game? Is it for a like?
Chasing the little notification, like I’d imagine a junkie chases their fix. Hoping for more, never having enough. Looking for validation through a notification. Is that what I’ve become?
Do I just anxiously watching my laptop’s screen, waiting for that notification, or do I carry on with life and pretend that I’m a fully functioning adult?
Guess
I’ll just wait and see.
I think it’s hope for validation of your effort. Which should be irrelevant because it’s your post, your mind, but if it is read and liked it gives you/us a feeling of appreciation. We all want to be seen. Acknowledged in what we do. Whether it’s a day at work, a painting or a post. I don’t see it as narcissistic.
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I don’t necessarily see it as narcissistic either, especially if you think it might be.
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I always write to clear my head. When I published my first three posts I found myself falling prey to the ” little notification fix”. I waited and waited…which led to a lot of questions on why I actually started blogging. So I can safely say I can relate to everything in your post. It’s like you read my mind. Thank you for showing me that I’m not the only one struggling with it.
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I think most people suffer from it, but don’t want to admit to it. Its probably an inherent part of the human condition.
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